8/23: Open Game Thread

Ichiro CF Catalanotto LF Vidro DH Wilkerson 1B Guillen RF Young "SS" Ibanez Reanimated Corpse Botts DH Beltre 3B Cruz RF Sexson 1B Saltaladhfaksjdfhalksjdfh C Johjima C Murphy CF Lopez 2B Metcalf 3B Betancourt SS Vazquez 2B ---------- ----------
Weaver (5-10, 5.57) Loe (6-9, 5.56)
Why, I think this calls for another Texas Rangers Middle Infield Update!
Kinsler: .752 OPS, .665 road OPS, -21 UZR (as of a month ago), .826 current range
Young: .776 OPS, .717 road OPS, -17 UZR, .809 current range
Using the trusty RARP + UZR formula, Ian Kinsler is worth +0.5 runs above a replacement-level player over 150 games. Michael Young is at +8.1. For the sake of comparison, Jose Lopez is at +10.6 - terrible offense and all - and Yuniesky Betancourt's at +1.0.
Our second baseman can't hit and our shortstop derives some kind of sick satisfaction from throwing the ball into the dugout, yet we still have the better combo. And we won't be paying either of them $16m a year until they turn 37.
I keep thinking this is going to get old but it never does. In Mitch Hedberg's world, it's like the complete opposite of pancakes.
LET'S GO MARINERS!!
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867 comments
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Mitch Hedberg.
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 12:39 PM PDT
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Yep:
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 1:02 PM PDT
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Mitch Hedberg did drugs?!?!
by PetRock on
Aug 23, 2007 1:27 PM PDT
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Yeah, that was pretty obvious.
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 1:29 PM PDT
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Jesus
by Dylan on
Aug 23, 2007 1:49 PM PDT
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Saw him live once, a few months before.
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 1:54 PM PDT
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I'm extremely jealous Jeff...
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 2:25 PM PDT
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Demetri Martin
by StevenH on
Aug 23, 2007 2:31 PM PDT
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Got to see
by DCMariner on
Aug 23, 2007 2:45 PM PDT
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I link to this every time Mitch comes up
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 2:47 PM PDT
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So did I
I saw him at the underground a few months before he died, the guy was hilarious.
"A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer"
RIP man.
by Notor on
Aug 23, 2007 4:03 PM PDT
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is it just me
I'm not dissing Mitch or anything, and it's great that so many people liked his work (myself included). I just find it slightly weird.
by Matthew on
Aug 23, 2007 4:35 PM PDT
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At least every few months.
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 4:40 PM PDT
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Weak middle infield defense?
by Gomez on
Aug 23, 2007 12:45 PM PDT
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You'll never see a temporarily out of service sign
by TyranT on
Aug 23, 2007 12:49 PM PDT
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Or the one about blocking the fire exit....
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 12:51 PM PDT
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yes
by thenatural on
Aug 23, 2007 1:09 PM PDT
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Exactly!!
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 1:12 PM PDT
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Mitch Hedberg on Golf
What's the par for hitting a guy? One. If you hit a guy in two, you are an asshole
by Nadingo on
Aug 23, 2007 1:53 PM PDT
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Semi-creepy
No joke.
by StevenH on
Aug 23, 2007 2:24 PM PDT
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I may steal that line
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 2:26 PM PDT
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Once I saw a wino...
R.I.P. Mitch
by carcinogen on
Aug 23, 2007 2:26 PM PDT
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I once smoked fake pot...
by carcinogen on
Aug 23, 2007 2:27 PM PDT
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"Fuck you Peter Frampton,
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 2:31 PM PDT
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Banana's are the opposite of traffic lights
A green banana means stop, not ready.
A yellow banana means go ahead and eat me
A red banana means....whoa where the fuck did you get that banana?
by Notor on
Aug 23, 2007 4:18 PM PDT
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Today's fun fact:
Figured. Out.
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 12:54 PM PDT
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I can imagine the scouting report:
by Graham on
Aug 23, 2007 12:56 PM PDT
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We're coming to get you, Anaheim!
Signed,
Fans of team who has puffier smoke and shinier mirrors
by Gomez on
Aug 23, 2007 12:56 PM PDT
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now if only
by thenatural on
Aug 23, 2007 1:10 PM PDT
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Or, even better
by Graham on
Aug 23, 2007 1:13 PM PDT
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Screw you Chone.
Asshat.
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 1:13 PM PDT
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My friends decided a long time ago...
by SethGrandpa on
Aug 23, 2007 1:32 PM PDT
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That's how I pronounce it as well.
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 1:40 PM PDT
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He's always "Gus Chiggins" to me
by Nadingo on
Aug 23, 2007 1:55 PM PDT
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Tigers lose
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 1:35 PM PDT
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The Mariners outliving the Tigers
by chrisisasavage on
Aug 23, 2007 1:37 PM PDT
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They're not done yet
by vkut79 on
Aug 23, 2007 1:43 PM PDT
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They're only 2.5 back of the Indians.
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 1:46 PM PDT
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They're still in it
If they drop another game today I think they're pretty much out of the wildcard race, but they could still beat the Indians.
by Notor on
Aug 23, 2007 4:13 PM PDT
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Their pitching just turned to shit once June
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 1:40 PM PDT
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Look at their staff
by Gomez on
Aug 23, 2007 3:15 PM PDT
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Last year's Tiger defense was amazing.
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 4:13 PM PDT
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plus their hitters way overachieved in the first
by Matthew on
Aug 23, 2007 4:29 PM PDT
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No Way
by MfaninAlaska on
Aug 23, 2007 4:39 PM PDT
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We are the last line of defense
by Robert on
Aug 23, 2007 1:41 PM PDT
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So if the Mariners end up winning the wildcard
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 2:33 PM PDT
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Red should be celebrated as a hero.
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 2:40 PM PDT
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s/b "credited"
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 2:40 PM PDT
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And throw in the fact
by ThundaPC on
Aug 23, 2007 2:43 PM PDT
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Jarrod Saltalamacchia
A Armada Charcoal Jilts
well, that was my favorite
by PhilKenSebben on
Aug 23, 2007 2:11 PM PDT
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Go Beer!
by chrisisasavage on
Aug 23, 2007 3:07 PM PDT
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the best beer
by InSpokane on
Aug 23, 2007 4:14 PM PDT
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Rogue!
by chaney on
Aug 23, 2007 3:59 PM PDT
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Oh my god.
It's great with hazelnut/chocolate Whole Soy frozen yogurt, too, by the way.
by acblue on
Aug 23, 2007 5:23 PM PDT
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So...
</attempt to make myself look less like an idiot>
by StevenH on
Aug 23, 2007 2:51 PM PDT
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Nope. It goes into the annals as a screwup.
by Phildopip on
Aug 23, 2007 2:56 PM PDT
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Well then
by StevenH on
Aug 23, 2007 2:57 PM PDT
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What's really great...
by SethGrandpa on
Aug 23, 2007 3:33 PM PDT
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True
by SethGrandpa on
Aug 23, 2007 4:40 PM PDT
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After our heads exploded
by PDXTai on
Aug 23, 2007 5:18 PM PDT
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I wouldn't mind if it didn't happen
by Gomez on
Aug 23, 2007 3:37 PM PDT
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But then if they lose in the playoffs
by Coach Owens on
Aug 23, 2007 3:41 PM PDT
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John Olerud couldn't handle the pressure...
by seattlesundevil on
Aug 23, 2007 3:46 PM PDT
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Niether could your mom.
by Coach Owens on
Aug 23, 2007 4:22 PM PDT
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Apparently nEither could your 3rd grade teacher..
by seattlesundevil on
Aug 23, 2007 4:31 PM PDT
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Knowing how shitty ESPN is,
by StevenH on
Aug 23, 2007 3:39 PM PDT
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I use Reply to This so often
by Llewdor on
Aug 23, 2007 3:56 PM PDT
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ESPN
by G_ on
Aug 23, 2007 4:14 PM PDT
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Fox is pretty ECB too, though.
by Coach Owens on
Aug 23, 2007 4:15 PM PDT
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WHAT WILL BECOME OF JOE MORGAN???!!?!
by StevenH on
Aug 23, 2007 4:16 PM PDT
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Those UZR numbers...
by chaney on
Aug 23, 2007 4:00 PM PDT
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Well played.
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 4:10 PM PDT
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ESPN
I hate to bring it up, but my first thought was of the Indians game a few years back.
I'm just glad it wasn't technically a blowout, because now I don't have to watch it. :)
by StevenH on
Aug 23, 2007 4:27 PM PDT
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This is odd:
Almost identical.
by Thingray on
Aug 23, 2007 5:09 PM PDT
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McLaren's idea of a day off for Johjima:
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 5:09 PM PDT
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Wells---> Dodgers
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 5:10 PM PDT
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Ahh it's veterans day again!!
It's kinda like groundhogs day a la Bill Murray except no matter how many times we repeat it we'll never do it right.
by Notor on
Aug 23, 2007 5:14 PM PDT
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As much as this might sound like heresy
by tootthekazoo on
Aug 23, 2007 5:18 PM PDT
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exhaust your every day players.
by Susheel Ramasahayam on
Aug 23, 2007 5:23 PM PDT
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I'm done complaining for a different reason:
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 5:25 PM PDT
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That is also certainly high on my list of reasons
by tootthekazoo on
Aug 23, 2007 5:29 PM PDT
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Send Jones back down if you're not using him
by Graham on
Aug 23, 2007 5:14 PM PDT
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Send him down
by Hackman Leonard on
Aug 23, 2007 5:20 PM PDT
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Wouldn't it be better
by PDXTai on
Aug 23, 2007 5:25 PM PDT
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Send him back down to do what?
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 5:23 PM PDT
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For like a week? It's not gonna make any
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 5:27 PM PDT
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yeah,
by Patrick517 on
Aug 24, 2007 2:41 AM PDT
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Anyone know about the results of Figgin's injury?
by vkut79 on
Aug 23, 2007 5:28 PM PDT
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No structural damage
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 5:33 PM PDT
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Oh yeah, McLaren.
by Coach Owens on
Aug 23, 2007 5:35 PM PDT
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HOT HAND HOT HAND HOT HAND
by tootthekazoo on
Aug 23, 2007 5:37 PM PDT
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Loe has his sinker working
by Susheel Ramasahayam on
Aug 23, 2007 5:42 PM PDT
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"Ugliest jersey tops ever"

by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 5:47 PM PDT
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is that supposed to be a constellation?
by basebliman on
Aug 23, 2007 5:52 PM PDT
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It's probably bewildering to him
by MfaninAlaska on
Aug 23, 2007 5:52 PM PDT
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In the Powerthirst commerical
by Robert on
Aug 23, 2007 5:52 PM PDT
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these texas announcers say the most reduntant
by Susheel Ramasahayam on
Aug 23, 2007 5:50 PM PDT
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but after listening to the white sox announcers
and being forced to listen to rex hudler, its not so bad
yesterday rex pronounced the word "anatomical" as "ant-a-nom-ical" about ten times then proceeded to say the word "resonance" as "renaissance" over and over
by seattlebruin on
Aug 23, 2007 5:53 PM PDT
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lol
jackass POS...........how does a dumbass like that, get to control a blog???? makes you appreciate AJM 100x more, when you see that asshole post.....besides that he talks stupid shit, the guy doesnt know what he's talkin about, period......"
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 5:53 PM PDT
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I can only imagine what they think of me
by Graham on
Aug 23, 2007 5:57 PM PDT
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I think they're on to something
But seriously, what did you do to make those guys mad at you? Am I missing something, or are they seriously getting mad because of what you said about their infielders?
by StevenH on
Aug 23, 2007 6:16 PM PDT
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Just thought of something
Which is weird, because I SWEAR we won 116 games that one year...
by StevenH on
Aug 24, 2007 12:35 AM PDT
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Micheal Young
by Graham on
Aug 23, 2007 5:51 PM PDT
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Good thing his extension hasn't kicked in yet.
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 5:52 PM PDT
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OUR INFIELD IS BETTER THAN YOURS!
by OBF on
Aug 23, 2007 5:52 PM PDT
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It's Jim Knox!
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 5:53 PM PDT
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YAY, I forgot about the silly fan interviews
by tootthekazoo on
Aug 23, 2007 5:54 PM PDT
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You figured that Mike Cameron
by Robert on
Aug 23, 2007 5:55 PM PDT
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Damn,
Arlington is one sad place to be this time of the year...
10 years ago this was the place to be to watch baseball in late August. I'm not talking about the weather, but the playoff atmosphere.
Funny how things change in so little time.
by wwbaker3 on
Aug 23, 2007 5:56 PM PDT
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I'm McLovin' it!
by wwbaker3 on
Aug 23, 2007 5:58 PM PDT
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"The M's and the Yankees..."
Are these guys better or worse than Hawk? I can't tell.
by TrashiDawa on
Aug 23, 2007 5:58 PM PDT
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Way way better
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:00 PM PDT
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woo hoo!....now score
by MFAN on
Aug 23, 2007 5:58 PM PDT
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Hey, 34672364 pitch AB, then base hit
by Gomez on
Aug 23, 2007 5:58 PM PDT
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Kam Loe is the latest entry
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 5:58 PM PDT
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looks more like a horse than a thumb..hmm..
by areacode206 on
Aug 23, 2007 6:00 PM PDT
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I really really do not like this ST uniforms in
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 5:58 PM PDT
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Yeah
by Gomez on
Aug 23, 2007 5:59 PM PDT
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they seem to like to use them on
that's the only explanation i can see.
by Patrick517 on
Aug 24, 2007 2:48 AM PDT
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That's what it is
by StevenH on
Aug 24, 2007 10:20 AM PDT
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Saltalamacchia is 'a work in progress'
As are the Texas Rangers.
by Gomez on
Aug 23, 2007 5:59 PM PDT
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Why didn't you swing at that Richie?
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 6:00 PM PDT
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But you swing at that?!
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 6:01 PM PDT
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Sexson..FUCK YOU BITCH
by kentroyals5 on
Aug 23, 2007 6:01 PM PDT
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Richie chases ball four for strike three
by Gomez on
Aug 23, 2007 6:01 PM PDT
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Double play time
by kentroyals5 on
Aug 23, 2007 6:01 PM PDT
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So, just to review
Slider way off the plate. Swing.
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 6:01 PM PDT
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Sure do love playing the hot hand.
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:01 PM PDT
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Richie strikes out low and away?
by tootthekazoo on
Aug 23, 2007 6:01 PM PDT
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better a k then a dp
by wadswerth on
Aug 23, 2007 6:02 PM PDT
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We woudlnt want to disapoint kenji would we
by wadswerth on
Aug 23, 2007 6:05 PM PDT
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Hey look
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:02 PM PDT
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Stunning Analysis by the Rangers
by Babar on
Aug 23, 2007 6:04 PM PDT
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Neihaus
by ThundaPC on
Aug 23, 2007 6:03 PM PDT
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Niehaus = a very wise foresighted man.
by esoteric on
Aug 23, 2007 6:06 PM PDT
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mlb.com tv
thanks
by Snuffleupagus on
Aug 23, 2007 6:03 PM PDT
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well
by Snuffleupagus on
Aug 23, 2007 6:08 PM PDT
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yeah...
by thenatural on
Aug 23, 2007 6:08 PM PDT
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I like to read a book during the game anyway.
Turns out the unabridged "Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire" goes really well with M's baseball.
by esoteric on
Aug 23, 2007 6:10 PM PDT
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i made it through like 1/8 of that...
by Patrick517 on
Aug 24, 2007 2:51 AM PDT
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i just read the Foundation series instead
by Matthew on
Aug 24, 2007 7:42 AM PDT
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from now on...
by Patrick517 on
Aug 26, 2007 10:22 AM PDT
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Rizz SURRRREEE
Saltsdflsdkflsdk
by OBF on
Aug 23, 2007 6:04 PM PDT
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Kenji!
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 6:05 PM PDT
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kenji hit a ground ball that wasn't a DP??
by basebliman on
Aug 23, 2007 6:05 PM PDT
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Wooooooo
by kentroyals5 on
Aug 23, 2007 6:05 PM PDT
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woot woot
by wadswerth on
Aug 23, 2007 6:05 PM PDT
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OUR INFIELD IS BETTER THAN YOURS
by OBF on
Aug 23, 2007 6:05 PM PDT
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The bases were not loaded.
Thanks Richie for swinging at ball 4.
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 6:06 PM PDT
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Jeff Francoeuer is 10-26 against Dontrelle Willis
Is it un-PC to say Francoeur owns him?
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:07 PM PDT
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I think we should just leave J-Lo and Richie
by kentroyals5 on
Aug 23, 2007 6:07 PM PDT
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well that was pleasant...
by basebliman on
Aug 23, 2007 6:07 PM PDT
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Well
FREE NICK GREEN. If we can free Rick White....
by Gomez on
Aug 23, 2007 6:07 PM PDT
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Hay guys, apparently Kam Loe
by tootthekazoo on
Aug 23, 2007 6:07 PM PDT
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Sadly this is a team that Lopez actually hits
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:08 PM PDT
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1-0
by MFAN on
Aug 23, 2007 6:09 PM PDT
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hmm
by houseofprime2 on
Aug 23, 2007 6:13 PM PDT
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He's older, so he must of been through even
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 6:15 PM PDT
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Vidro hasn't been in any wars
by DCMariner on
Aug 23, 2007 6:17 PM PDT
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it had to be a war
by marinerschas2 on
Aug 23, 2007 6:20 PM PDT
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cant win em all
by marinerschas2 on
Aug 23, 2007 6:24 PM PDT
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now he's a "proffessional hitter"
by Patrick517 on
Aug 24, 2007 2:54 AM PDT
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Rangers/White Sox next week
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:18 PM PDT
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i wonder if baltimore will take him back now since
by houseofprime2 on
Aug 23, 2007 6:19 PM PDT
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Thank God
by DCMariner on
Aug 23, 2007 6:19 PM PDT
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Think Ichiro can play an instrument?
by andyboi on
Aug 23, 2007 6:20 PM PDT
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Why does Vidro foul so many balls off
by Graham on
Aug 23, 2007 6:22 PM PDT
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Ichiromania is still alive!
by Susheel Ramasahayam on
Aug 23, 2007 6:22 PM PDT
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This game is booooooooring
by kentroyals5 on
Aug 23, 2007 6:22 PM PDT
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Guillen has the wrong idea
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:24 PM PDT
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Wheres that "Texgoesyard" guy?
Or did he kill himself after Tex was traded?
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 6:26 PM PDT
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Today feels different.
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:27 PM PDT
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Text message from friend
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 6:29 PM PDT
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Well Well Well
Over at my home blog of LSB I am now known as SaltyGoesYard, which if you watched sports center, baseball tonight, or any sports reporting show last night or today, YOU SAW IN FULL FORCE BABY.
Remember last game guys, PUTZ IN. GAME OVER?!
But seriously, I want you to sweep us so you increase your lead against the yankees, thereby knocking them from the playoffs, causing Arod to opt out, freeing us up more cash to dominate you for the next decade.
by TexGoesYard on
Aug 23, 2007 6:29 PM PDT
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Ah, there it is.
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 6:31 PM PDT
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Which you will then spend on such scary players
by Graham on
Aug 23, 2007 6:32 PM PDT
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nothing says "domination"
by Patrick517 on
Aug 24, 2007 2:56 AM PDT
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resign weaver next year???..waddayathink?
by areacode206 on
Aug 23, 2007 6:30 PM PDT
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Well shit.
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 6:30 PM PDT
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Game Over
by kentroyals5 on
Aug 23, 2007 6:30 PM PDT
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I hate Texas
by MFAN on
Aug 23, 2007 6:30 PM PDT
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ouch
by wadswerth on
Aug 23, 2007 6:30 PM PDT
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Wow....
That stings.
All you guys have to do is get Jeff Weaver into the playoffs, he becomes your Ace after that.
by TexGoesYard on
Aug 23, 2007 6:31 PM PDT
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damn, they pissed weaver off
by wadswerth on
Aug 23, 2007 6:32 PM PDT
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Rangers went 3-3 on their road trip
by MFAN on
Aug 23, 2007 6:35 PM PDT
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Heh.
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:36 PM PDT
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Craig Monroe --> Cubs
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:37 PM PDT
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BOOO RICHIE
by kentroyals5 on
Aug 23, 2007 6:37 PM PDT
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Richie Sexson only hits manly pitches.
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:39 PM PDT
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Time to go watch preseason football
by kentroyals5 on
Aug 23, 2007 6:40 PM PDT
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That Richie Sexson is red-hot.
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:40 PM PDT
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That cookie lady
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:43 PM PDT
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Stop diving, Ichiro.
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:44 PM PDT
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he slid
by andyboi on
Aug 23, 2007 6:45 PM PDT
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So bad Weaver today eh?
by Goose on
Aug 23, 2007 6:45 PM PDT
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not quite yet...
by wadswerth on
Aug 23, 2007 6:46 PM PDT
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too early to make that call
by sammy on
Aug 23, 2007 6:47 PM PDT
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fuck you texas
by MFAN on
Aug 23, 2007 6:45 PM PDT
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doh
by wadswerth on
Aug 23, 2007 6:45 PM PDT
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That's some good timing.
/home run
by Jeff on
Aug 23, 2007 6:45 PM PDT
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spoke too soon, tom...
by thenatural on
Aug 23, 2007 6:45 PM PDT
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