Look, I don't know what it is, but there's just something about the Rangers that renders me incapable of writing a recap. This isn't meant as an indictment of the team - they're pretty solid, and they're a hell of a lot more interesting to watch than, say, Oakland usually is - but for whatever reason, whenever these two teams hook up, I just don't know what to say. The games are uneventful, and when I'm doing my best to stave off complete disinterest for nine innings, it's hard to get the imagination and creativity kick-started again at two in the morning. What these teams need is a good old-fashioned fistfight to build something of a rivalry, because I just can't deal with this mutual indifference.
Biggest Contribution: Kenji Johjima, +11.3%
Biggest Suckfest: Jose Guillen, -11.9%
Most Important At Bat: Beltre double, +11.6%
Most Important Pitch: Kinsler homer, -15.1%
Total Contribution by Pitcher(s): -7.2%
Total Contribution by Position Players: -42.8%
No, I don't know what's wrong with Ichiro. I suspect nobody does, except maybe the guy himself. He's doing that fly ball thing he does in all of his slumps, but the strikeouts are new and unusual; he entered the day with a 76% contact rate when he swings (career 89%, league average 80%), and then missed another four times in eight hacks in the game. For the first time in his career I can say that he legitimately looks lost, and the offense is suffering as a result. Cue another raging "should we give him an extension or not?" debate. I haven't the slightest clue what's going on in his head, but perhaps Ironically Batless Adrian Beltre can lend some insight. We'll have a chat.
Anyway, yeah, my mind is just totally blank right now. Sorry. Padilla and Batista go tomorrow at 12:55pm PDT as the Mariners look to reduce their number of four-digit ERAs by 33%.